February 2012
27 posts
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It wasn’t that she woke up at 3:20 a.m. with a man in her bedroom that startled her so much, though it was a rare enough occurrence that it justified her alarm.
No, the unsettling thing was that her late night interlocutor was a dead Frenchman who’d been in the ground for the better part of a century and a half.
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180º career shift achievement: UNLOCKED
Stay tuned for details. Some shit’s about to change.
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True facts: I have never seen a single episode of...
But we can still be friends, right?
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“Which one of you dirty motherbitches drank the last Coke Zero?”
– Eudora Welty
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Affirmation
Today I will wield words like weapons.
The pen will be my B-17.
And the blank page, God have mercy on it, will be my Dresden.
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..and eight, eight..
..I forget what eight was for.
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Does anyone else have that recurring dream? You...
No? Just me?
Okay then.
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Every silver lining is darkest just before the...
I sprang from my bed this morning like one of the more limber cast members of Cirque du Soleil. I felt rested and fresh.
I made what was arguably the best vacuum-pot of coffee I have tasted in years.
I had an absolutely perfect shave, making my head and face as smooth as a newborn dolphin’s belly while managing to spare myself even a single nick, and leaving 100,000 follicles as cozy and...
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I don't own a bicycle.
But we can still be friends, right?
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So, wait - there's a football game on TV today?
If that’s true, then they’ve done a terrible job of advertising that fact, because I had no idea.
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I JUST SPENT A DOLLAR. HOW YOU LIKE ME NOW?
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If I were to describe my day, it would likely read...
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